whew, i’m totally tired as usual. i’m also nice and full and happy, another feeling with which i am quite familiar. 🙂 i really like being able to cook for myself. i’m finding that i eat much healthier and am much happier with what i eat when i get to be in charge of what i eat. maybe i’m just a control freak. 🙂
while i was eating my delicious dinner i did some of the english reading i’d been assigned (informally, though) on the first day of shakespeare class. i can’t believe the introduction to the norton shakespeare is actually fascinating, but it is. it’s all background information on what england was like during shakespeare’s time. i guess it’s been so long since i heard about that time period from the point of view of bubonic plague (bacteria on fleas on rats! hehe — maybe only sphi will get this one.) and the east india company instead of from the perspective of starving colonists on the other side of the atlantic.
i had two interesting dreams last night. i wonder what they meant. i think the first one was all about my inner insecurities and feelings of inferiority, because in it i was not only inferior to everyone else but also ignorant of the fact that i was inferior. i had gotten a 660 on an sat-ii (i swear i don’t dream about those things on a regular basis) and was proudly touting that fact, but when i told people i had ‘done well’ and asked how they did, they responded that they too had ‘done well – 780.’ somehow the dream-me didn’t realize that her score wasn’t too hot. i was also entered into a contest in which i had to identify chinese characters, and i couldn’t read any of them, while other people were going through them super-quickly. i couldn’t even write my name in chinese! (thankfully not true.) anyway, it’s pretty obvious that dream was about that little inferiority complex i’ve been trying to squash. (if you put down an inferiority complex, does it emerge feeling more inferior than before?)
my second dream seemed to go against the inferiority thing. i don’t know if this is common, but before last night i’d never before had a dream about flying. other people i’ve talked to have all had flying dreams, but i’d never had one. i wondered if that meant something about my self-esteem, although personally i think i have perfectly healthy self-esteem. but anyway, my second dream involved flying. okay, okay, so i was flying in a plane, but the plane contained a bomb and i and the other people in the plane were trying to take it away from the island we were fleeing, so we could save the world. flying+saving the world = super-ego. the rest of the dream was really complicated so i won’t explain it here because i have noticed in my limited life experience that people get bored by hearing other people’s dreams. but what i’m wondering now is, does this mean my self-esteem now exceeds my inferiority complex?
one more thought before i sign off: maybe i’m weird, but tonight i cooked a chicken breast without seasoning and i thought it was absolutely delicious. i adored it and savored every bite. are there other people out there who actually like plain chicken breast, or does everyone like theirs with salt and pepper at the very least?
[note, 4/10/14: Imported from my old blog at satsumabug.livejournal.com.]